A Parent’s Role in Raising Emotional Resilient Children

Synergy Strategists May 23,2016 Comments(0) Likes(2) Parenting

A Parent’s Role in Raising Emotional Resilient Children 



As a parent, you want the best for your children. You hope for them to have quality relationships, to do well in school, live out their dreams and have an overall happy and healthy life. One factor that could determine how children fare as adults is their level of emotional resilience. The term ‘emotional resilience' refers to a person's emotional strength and while it is often utilized when describing someone who has overcome extreme adversity, it's an important skill for kids with average or healthy life experiences.


Most parents realize that the probability of their kids enduring challenges during their lifetime is high. Many can recall their own challenges from childhood such as the weight of social pressures, the awkward silences in classrooms, the fear of the dreaded school dance, and maybe even the pain of rejection. Although there is no way to protect kids from suffering the common adversities in life, parents can work to strengthen their children’s inner stamina by modeling healthy behaviors.


It’s true that children look to their parents for guidance. Here are some helpful ideas for parents to fortify your child’s emotional muscles and ensure they’ll have the toughness to weather the storms of life:


1.     Communicate well.  Communication is more than just speaking to others or having a conversation. Effective communication includes active listening and when we listen to our kids, we’re validating their ideas. When a parent can listen without judgment, a child learns how to communicate their feelings.


2.   Show Empathy.  Parents who can put themselves in their kids' place, working to understand where their child's actions or thoughts may be coming from, will teach their kids that they are valued. Even if a child's views significantly differ from yours, you can validate without giving in.  A parent who exhibits compassion will yield a child who is capable of understanding viewpoints that are different from their own.


3.   Don't speak in Absolutes.  Try to rule out the terms "never" or "always" and focus on the current discussion.  If your child isn't doing the dishes, accusing them of "never doing the dishes" isn't productive.  Instead, stay present with the issue at hand and tell them how their actions (or inaction) makes you feel.  This will garner a child who can listen to others.


4.   Practice Acceptance. You may not want to accept something about your children, such as a limitation in scholastic aptitude or a preference to play a video game instead of football, but acceptance is love. When parents can accept their children unconditionally, they are helping them to accept themselves. You don't have to tolerate the inappropriate behavior, but you can recognize the uniqueness of your child and assist them to set realistic goals for themselves that are in line with their talents.


5.   Give Back.  When a child sees their parents practicing giving to others, they learn to give. If you provide your children with the opportunity to be of service to others, you are showing them compassion and responsibility.


6.   Stay Positive.  Nagging a child isn't productive and most parents can recall being nagged at one point in their lives. Also, parents who speak and think negatively beget children who do the same. Teaching young people that there are alternative, positive ways to disagree or solve a problem is a valuable skill indeed.


Parents who take the time to reinforce their children's self-esteem, silent their inner critic and encourage hope will raise resilient children with the strength and compassion to sustain viable relationships and enjoy a healthy, happy life.



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